Valentine’s Day is a time where couples come together to profess their love for each other by buying gifts, flowers, and going out to eat. This holiday is one of the only holidays where couples are not really too concerned about where money is being spent because it is in the name of love! HOWEVER, while many relationships seem perfect, there can be unfaithfulness happening right under your nose. Studies have shown that close to 30% of all divorces happen due to financial stress between the couples. So with this revelation how can you tell if your spouse is being financially loyal? Ash Exantus, Financial Empowerment Coach at BankMobile, America’s largest and fastest growing Digital Bank has come up with the following are tips to tell if your financial relationship might not be monogamous:
You Can’t Find Any Financial Statements
The beginning signs of financial infidelity start when financial statements start going missing. If you can’t find a recent bank, credit card, investment and/or loan statements that something is most definitely up. Also, if your spouse goes paperless but never shares the financial statements or account login information with you then that’s a problem.
There are Unexplained Withdrawals and Transfer from Your Account
Most married couples usually have good communication when it comes to financial affairs so any withdrawals and/or transfers are usually known beforehand. When you look at your statement and notice a few withdrawals and/or transfers that have not been discussed. This can signal that your spouse is cheating financially. On what… the list can be long.
You Never Talk About Finances
In order to have a healthy relationship, then being on the same page financially is very important. If you and your spouse never discuss financial matters, then there may be financial trouble in paradise. If he or she avoids the topic of money altogether or tries to change the topic when money comes up then you may be a victim of financial infidelity.
Your Money Questions Are Never Answered Directly
Vagueness about money is a tell-tale sign that your spouse may be hiding something financially. Responses like “I have everything under control” or “There’s nothing to worry about” are not good. These are strong indications that your spouse is hiding something or intentionally dodging an issue. Also, if your spouse gets angry, annoyed, or defensive when you ask money questions then ring the alarm!
You Never Meet to Discuss Financial Plans or Your Financial Future
Marriage is a union between two individuals who decide to become one. In this holy matrimony, if your financial future is never a topic of discussion then you have a bigger problem then you even realize. Either your spouse is too controlling or they are committing a big financial sin. Either way, not meeting to discuss financial plans can be an indication your spouse may be financially stepping out.
You Don’t Have a Joint Savings Account
Joint savings accounts are mandatory in a marriage because you both should be saving for your future together. If your savings accounts are separate then this means that your spouse may not trust you with money. It can also mean that they want access to money with no questions asked. This is the beginning of financial infidelity 101.
You Make Enough Money but It Seems to be not Enough
Lastly, if you look at all of your bills then hold it against the income that is coming into the household and you notice that you are always coming up short, then this can mean that there is a financially money leak somewhere. Sometimes financial infidelity happens slowly so that the other spouse is not alarmed. Maybe $100 here and there, but over the long haul you may be wondering why don’t you have anything to show for your money.
Money can be a tough topic to discuss but if you are serious about your union make sure that you confront any of these signs as soon as possible. It may be nothing or it may be that your spouse is trying to surprise you with something nice… But it also may be something and your suspicion may be right on target… As the saying goes, “Better safe, than sorry!” Ask the tough questions so that you are not left holding an empty bag!